All the single ladies, with all the non-single friends.

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This.

12. Partnered friends want all your hot single gossip. Like being single is a nonstop vodka ad and you’re having the time of your life. But truthfully you’re like, “I don’t have any gossip. I just eat in bed a lot.”

FromĀ 12 Problems Only You, the Single Friend, Understand.

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All the single ladies, with all the non-single friends.

Living with the enemy ex

Him: “You took FOREVEEEER in the shower this morning!”

Me: “Yeah, I had to wash my hair and shave my legs.”

Him: “Double whammy! Does that mean you’re out tonight?”

Me: “No, I just haven’t shaved my legs in over a week. It’s winter and I’m single. Leave me alone.”

I know all you single ladies out there know what I’m talking about, I enjoy a dirty state of hairiness when the effort is not required.

It’s remnant to when I was single a couple of years ago and I was on the one-night-stand bus. I used to purposely not shave my legs to stop myself taking a man home. In all honesty though, it made fuck all difference, and the men at the time didn’t give a shit either.

Living with the enemy ex